Kudos to the most spirited team I have ever seen!!!

I would classify today's tug of war event as by far the most important event of intersection sports and one of the most momentous moments of my life. I could not stop writing about this event, one because I have never gotten so excited post Samhar and second because I have never seen such highly spirited team - like EVER!!! It was a game that was packed with so many emotions that I cannot begin to tell. Some of the highlights of the event - if anyone had missed it.

The Team Selection

So, the normal day starts with the usual cop fin lecture, continues with MPPO group having 107 slides to be presented and then by a marathon marketing lecture. Little did we know that this seemingly long commonplace day had loads of energy and ethusiasm in store for us. At 7:30, the team was in throwball court for the Tug of War event. Trials were carried out to get the best 6 players - who were within the weight limit to play for us. Poor Gauri was the one against whom everyone was tried and tested. Sec C was on court and suddenly PMS enters and displays her might. Last minute subs and Kinjal was replaced with PMS. We won the match against B fair and square.

The Problem

As PCN would say - Shit hit the roof after the match. Yours truly displayed her complete lack of mathematical skills because in the heat of moment of getting the best team, we crossed the weight limit. We were the first ones to admit our mistake, apologised our mistake and waited for the sports council to give a decision if it was a re-match or a disqualification. Incidentally, it so happened that Sec B was also overweight and therefore, it was unanimously agreed that we would have a rematch. Before the rematch, there were some bickerings about parllax error in weighing, availability of flat surface, zero error adjustments etc. So, along with my maths skills, my physics fundaes were also revised today :)

The Rematch

Match 2 started with Shruthi not playing the first pull. We gave in to the sec B team but this did not dampen the spirits. Shruthi agreed to play and resumed her position in the front and pulled victory away from sec B team, when they were only a few centimeters away. Hats off to this girl's spirits to one - not have given up realising that we were almost out and two - come and play disregarding her health and keeping the team above it. Of course, hadn't been for the support of the other 5, the front person could not have succeeded alone. After the impossible win (as many spectators later called it) the third pull was a cake walk and then the look on all these 6 girls faces was priceless. I wish at that point in time I had a camera to capture - the victorious smile, the satisfaction of winning fair & square and the determination that we have to teach a lesson.

The Finals

There was a really long break before the finals started. We were playing with no substitutes and not with the winning team combo. In addition, the fact that they had 6 pulls as opposed to 3 that the opponents made things even worse. This game requires hajar strength and we had exhausted ours in these 6 pulls. Yes! the things did look difficult at that point in time and I was dying of hajar guilt. For one, I kept blaming myself for making them go through the torment of a rematch and second for actually thinking that instead of playing the finals, we give them a walkover. Gold glitters the most when it is heated the most.The girls fighting it out (for whatever position) in today's event would have been the only befit ending to this trial by fire. And this was where I learnt the third lesson for the day - place the team above an individual. Kudos to Kinjal to place the team over her beliefs, to come to aid when the team needed the most and finally to NOT give up whatever happened. I'm not sure how many would have done the same thing you did for this section. First pull - Aastha displayed an awesome initial pull to make sure theu get a run for money. However, luck did not favor us and we lost. The bigger problem was Tanu got hurt in the process and we were thinking of calling it off at that point to prevent injuries to others. Thats when the entire team amazed me again - because not only did they play but they won. Aswathy in the front did an awesome job of not letting go and Devi anchored superbly from behind. I almost saw PMS, Gauri, Aastha and Kinjal at 20 degrees to the horizontal to get maximum force. The determination paid off again and we got the final chance to win the event. Similar effort again, this time sec D got a wee bit closer to winning but the team proved their mettle and won...

Aftermath

I do not know how the team would have performed had Shruti been there. I do not know if I would have made any difference, had I been there. I do not know if we had not gotten the weight wrong in the first place, whether we would have felt better after winning the finals. All I know is that if any team deserved to win - it was SEC C... And I do not say this because I belong to this section. Sportsmanspirit and Skill are the two most fundamental things that are tested in any field (events, rules etc become secondary then) and that makes a sportsperson. I proudly say that I have met 8 such true sportspersons who come 10 on 10 on both these parameters.

PROUD OF U!! You were responsible to get a smile on my face and owe you one for that :)

Memorable Samahar!!!

This is not my article but a snippet from the article a friend from IIMB wrote... Its about the Basketball Match between the IIMC and IIMB teams @ Calcutta... The Girls' Baski Team rose like the Dark Horse towards victory adding their bit in the 7 - 4 win over Calcutta!!! Here is how the snippet about Baski Girls goes:-

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Basketball (Girls):

Arguably, the fate of Samhar 2007 was decided by this memorable performance displayed by our Girls Basketball team. Purely going by the average height or weight of the two teams, no one would have given our girls a chance. But our ‘5-feet-someones’ displayed steely resolve, relentless stamina, and exemplary grit to overcome all their “short”comings to register probably the finest moment of the Sports Meet.

Led from the front by Nupur Kalgaonkar, the “Girl from Kolhapur”, the team had a clear mission: don’t let the ball reach the opponents. They snatched at the ball, jumped in unison and did a lot more than what had been seen on a Basketball court before, and, importantly, never gave possession of the ball. In between all the drama, Anjali scored from a free throw to take an early lead in the match, and the score after 2 quarters was 1-0. Another free throw in our favour, and this made the score 2-2 at the end of the 3rd quarter, with everything to play for.
The 4th quarter had some heart-stopping moments but nothing to add to the score. Just when the spectators were getting ready to go into extra time with only 28 seconds to go on the clock, the ‘oh-not-so-shy’ Sharmili Phulgirkar somehow stole the ball from the opponents, raced towards the basket, defied all odds, and actually put the damn thing in the basket, a feat she never achieved during any of the practice sessions!

A special mention for Nidhi Gupta, whose defence was impeccable, and whoever she marked visibly felt awfully stifled! The match was also memorable for the celebrations after every basket, which reminded one of goals in footer matches! (this comment is coz the score was 4-2; yeah! yeah! i know reminds you of a football match score!!!)

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The entire sports meet remains a memorable experience... The girley gossip we indulged the first night, the practice sessions we had a week before that, the cheering squad and its importance, the bonds that were made stronger after the meet, the rain dance in the end where we let our hair loose and finally the BIG cup in the team's hands which just made the entire exercise worthwhile and bore sweet fruits for the pains we put in....

Three Cheers for IIMB- Hip Hip Hurray!! Hip Hip Hurray!! Hip Hip Hurray!!

Aila - Kya match Tha!!!!

The first event at IIMB which really got me excited :))))))))) The names might not be familiar but the mood is!!!!
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The phrase - A cricket match is not lost till the last ball is bowled actually proved its verity in yesterday's match. The girls' cricket match between the PGP1 and PGP2 girls was not only very exciting but also surfacing of hidden talents of our batch... For all those people who missed the extremely captivating match, here is a small account -

Amidst the confusion of having the event or postponing it, I finally got a message from Parul (lot more about her later) saying the match is @ 11:30 pm and the team is ready. As budding managers, we meet just about every deadline perfectly, so both PGP1 and PGP2 girls brought in their teams on time.

The match began with Parul and Ragini opening. It was nothing short of Virendera Sehwag and Sachin Tendulkar opening. Sixes, Fours, Running between wickets was fantastic. Then on Shruti's (PGP2) bowling, a stupid tree came in the middle giving Nidhi a very easy catch and sent our very own Ragini back :( Then came Madhumita who gave the same support to our captain (Parul) who only spoke the language of 4s and 6s. The highlight in their fielding was a spectacular catch taken by Mansi Gupta (sideways, lower than her knees) which unfortunately was on a no ball. This stroke of bad luck proved deadly for the PGP2s, since Parul was unstoppable after that. She had got a chance and she meant business!! So, finally after 6 overs we were 119 with the fall of one wicket.

With full confidence, our side came to bowl. We had set a very difficult target and that only boosted our players confidence. Mansi Gupta and Saumya were their openers and Sarbjeet our bowler. Mansi hit 6s in first 2 balls and after which Sarab changed her bowling line. Mansi came ahead and tried to hit the ball which happily went into Madhumita's (wicket keepers) hands who was prompt enough to get her stumped. Third ball and one wicket (one of their good batsman) down and our confidence was on cloud number nine. Then came Saumya who miraculously changed the game from 12 for 1 in 1 over to something like 88 for 1 in 4 overs. Man!! would we lose the match :O Tension on both sides. With the huge number of 6s hit, 32 in 2 overs and Saumya being there, it seemed feasible.

Next over by Sarab and the scene was 19 off the last over. Parul came to bowl in this high pressure moment. The first ball bowled and a 6. The second one went off to the boundary. 9 runs off 4 balls - VERY doable. Neha doing everything to ensure Saumya is on strike and here she was. then the next 3 balls were dot balls. Parul finally got the length right. So, one ball and 9 to win - the match was ours. The celebrations already started among the PGP1s and just then, Saumya hit a 6 on a no ball. The result - 1 ball to go and 2 runs needed. And just when we thought the match was lost, Parul came up with an awesome ball, bowling Saumya off the last ball to get us on the road to victory!!!!!!!

Kudos to the entire team! A special mention to all the guys/girls who stayed up after a looooooooooong day to cheer the team... It DOES make a difference!

Expressions

You go to any card shop - archies, hallmark - and you are bound to see one section called - Expression Greeting Cards... The cards of this genre - express things that you never verbally say (lack of courage or opportunity)... I found myself going to that section when bang came a mother's day, father's day or sister's day etc.... Was it coz I wanted to give flowery cards with poems or roses or Anne Geddes babies??? But this might not be the case since more often than not, I ended up buying a very simple card - its crux being - thanks for everything you did in my life and for being there or a plain I love u... Funny, aint it! These are the very people closest to me and I cannot say a simple thanks to them or a I love you to them!

What kind of a coward am I; I need a card made by a stranger and a day started by another stranger to tell them that they are appreciated, that they are special!!! To add to this miserable feeling, I am not even sure why did the firangs come up with this day... Every year I decide to check it up and every year after the card is given - this mission goes into oblivion! This makes me such a bad person - doesn't it? And given this very logical fact - why aren't these people doing anything about the bad person in their life??? Hasn't my mother completely lost it with my cribs and my ingrate nature? Hasn't my father lost his patience with my impertinence? When will my sister quit shopping for me - despite me not showing any enthusiasm for what she shops? And a scary thought comes to me - what if all this I mentioned above came true? The answer to this is very evident too - I'll DIE!!! Coz there would be no support system that helps me survive... Not remotely belittling the presence of friends and relatives in my life... But when the central existence of your life loses meaning, nothing else can help...

And so its very easy to take them for granted - Coz they are there - ALWAYS... A strange kind of love that has developed, over the years, with the sense of belonging and the knowledge of blood ties that bind us all... This love is well aware of its destructive power as well as its constructive powers and this makes miracles happen... There is this very sticky glue of acceptance that is the core of these relationships! So, if I move on to the next THE MOST IMPORTANT relation in anyone's life does this theory hold true? The relation is Spouse, isn't it? So, can we actually expect someone who has lived the formative years of his/her life in different surroundings to reach the same comfort level w.r.t how much to be expressed? Everyone, in their own right, does the same things to their families - then - can they do the same thing to each other and survive?

How important is expressing in this case? Does expressing on only few occassions suffice? If not, what is the point when you know that you have expressed enough? What if these points dont match? How do you cross these turbulent times to reach the ultimate halcyon in your lives? I know the answer of most of these questions is going to be - its dependent on the people involved.... Also, simple maths tells me that for this relationship there are more means to express (physical and emotional) and more time (considering average life of 60 years still gives this phase 35 years...)... Yet, we hear an anomaly - increasing rates of divorces, fights and misunderstandings blown out of proportions along with decreasing number of long lasting relationships...

Why does this happen? The simplist in me begs the answer to the following question - Why cant equations just be as simple as they are with our family... Why do we complicate the matters when a new person enters the core... Family and Friends just seem to do fine with or without the expected levels of expressions - then why does this ONE relationship get affected so much by it.... It works for family coz of the reasons cited above... In case of friends, even if they do get affected by this - I believe the repercussions of a broken friendship are a layer above the core and this helps absorb the undesirable change much better...

A dear friend always tells me - its easy to point of faults, its even easier to ask questions but what is difficult is giving a way of handling the same... I am not going to be presumptuous and trivialise this issue and come up with some scotch tape solution... But I feel what i say below works as a solution for everything.... I feel that just going and shouting helps - Go out there people! Talk, set your expectations right and make sure there are no loose ends coz they would then take the form of unrequitted EXPRESSIONS that cant close the loop.... And the argument will begin all over!!!!!

Jolted back from Inactivity

The inactivity was partly due to a sudden transition on a personal front (moving from a professional to a student) and partly due to my uncanny knack of getting things done in a complicated way... Gimme something that can be easily done and be rest assured that I can easily complicate it by introducing hajar variables... Sad story of my life but true...

A trip to Singapore had been planned since April first week... It was May last week that I finally made it there... But, this trip was wrought with hajar complications...

First - Tickets!!! My agent (ticketing one) suddenly got very busy and could help me out only by Monday (which was 21st May) I strongly believed that this is very late considering a 30th flight I wanted to take and the visa wasnt stamped... couldnt possibly book before that (as you all must ve wondered) coz my last date was not getting finalised... So, till those formalities were done, I could not go ahead with the booking... So, I asked Vraj to get it done for me on a Friday!!! (since monday seemed too close to the departure date) Smart, you wud think! But, the stupid Malaysian Airlines have no E-ticket and they courier tickets only to US addresses forced Vraj to order to his addr and then courier it to me (which reached only by Friday).. However, the itenary was sufficient enough to get a visa and it served my purpose...

Second - Visa... By now you would have thought 21st I shud ve started the Visa process right.. But, my agent (yup this is not the same person...) had to go on a 2 day leave the same week :( Net Net - no visa process till 24th and tickets were in USA... Finally Visa process was about to start (meaning docs were all given) and my agent says it would be better if Sudha sends a signed invitation... She sends... But her affinity for June (her bday) and July month (my bday) came into picture... Instead of saying 30 May to 6th June, she writes, 30 June to 6 July... So, poor thing had to fax the copy again... Many such docs made Sudha run in Singapore and me run from bldg. 14 to bldg. 1 a lot on the 24th... Finally, everything came thru and Visa was supposed to be with me Tuesday (29th May)

Third - Perhantian trip (highlight of the trip - one of the top 10 most beautiful places to visit as per TIME magazine) - This required me to start a Malaysia visa process.. Docs should be same except for ticket difference n that invitation letter... Everything was in place but one issue... Passport in SGP consulate and we cannot start Mal visa till we get it... It takes 7 dys to get Mal visa so in no way could I start visa process for Mal... But good news... I can get on entry since I am going for only 2 days!! Great luck I thought... Told Sudha and waited for passport to come through...

Fourth - ECNR - Chat with GS... on 28th May

Me - "YEEE! I am coming to Perhantian... Cool na"
GS - "what about visa???"
Me - "on arrival"
GS - "Cool, so have an ECNR right..."
Me - "excuse me - ECNR?????"
GS - "arre, its a stamp - blah blah blah - you need it to get Mal visa.. Should take around an hours time"
Me (slighltly panicky but firmly) - ok! can do it on Wednesday.. (confirmed with agent - personal presence not reqd)

Fifth - Forex - Cannot get till you get a Visa... So, cannot happen before Tuesday! But, got everything arranged so that it wont be a fight on the last day...

Finally the events that followed were -

1. got the SGP visa on tuesday but in Mumbai...
2. ECNR process was supposed to be started by Girish with an authority letter from me.. But, Mal e-ticket was not allowed, train tickets were not correct, personal presence wasnt there, TIME wasnt there... SO, after a fight (in SGP, Pune and Mumbai) we realised we cannot get it done :((((((( As depressing as it sounds but the Perhantian trip got cancelled... All the snorkelling dreams went into drain... And to add to my variable list, passport was with Girish in his office in mumbai...
3. Forex did not come thru to Pune in time before I left... So, had to collect it from Mumbai house...supporting docs copy (passport, Visa and itenary was with me in Pune...)
4. Last day at work was incidentally the same day of my flight... So, major running around happened and finally finished all formalities by 3:00 pm only... which made it impossible to reach my house by 6:00 when forex came to my house...

So, the vairables involved in this trip -
- Me in pune... had to make it to airport by 9:00 pm sharp as that was checking time (despite leaving 1.5 hour after the planned time)... On my way, volvo bus broke down, AC stopped functioning in the claustrophobic bus, landslide happened at the ghats on the way - leading to a major traffic jam...
- Girish in his office with my passport... I think its somewhere in South Mumbai...
- Dad with forex and bag - Coming from Borivli.. Now, getting forex also was a herculean task for my father and stud that he is - he could get it done... No docs were present at Borivli... So, finally after some phone calls he got it done.. Btw, my phone battery drained out - so during this time I (who had all the information) was out of reach...
- Namu coming with my clothes that I had to change (was in office formals since came directly from office) from Borivli... Clothes needed some altering and were at the tailors place till 4:00 pm...

I am sure by now who survied this account of terrible planning have concluded that I havent made it to SGP... And even if the optimistic folk believed that I made it, they must have thot - with the highlight trip out of the plan, the trip wouldnt have been too much fun... And all must have agreed the dire need for me to do some management course... C'mon - I must have got atleast one right ;))))))

But, here is the reality...
All variables converged @ airport at 8:40 (before time - in my case - is a big deal)... Me changed into jhakas clothes and got all the things in place... Came to SGP in one piece (despite this my first flying experience, despite having connecting flights - not direct ones and despite the fact that had Sudha not come @ airport I would have been completely lost... But nothing that my pessimistic brain suggested happened and I reached safely... Today is the third day (this was when I was supposed to be back from the ful-filled Perhantian trip) and the fun hasnt still stopped... Is it because of the place, the people, the excitement or just a change - I do not know... But, fact remains - that I am having fun and am all geared up to learn management lessons after a refreshing, badly-managed break :))))))

And finally the winner is!!!! (Part 6)

Its amazing how you can remember something despite the huge time gap between the events... I was supposed to write about my interviews as and when they were done but superstitions prohibited me from doing this... I wondered how could I conclude these interview excerpts until I know the definitive result... So, after I got my results I started to write about my interviews... I thought this effort would not be as comprehensive as compared to writing about the interviews immediately after they happened but I was surprised with the outcome...

When I started writing about them, I was actually reliving those experiences... If I believed in time machines then I would have thought that there is one in my house... Coz, it had transported me back to that place and time when I was taking the interview...

I am not sure if this experience helps anyone but just writing about them gave this 3 year journey a perfect end... A perfect result where I was in the b-school I always preferred... A perfect example of how never-say-die attitude works for anyone and everyone... And finally a perfect feeling in my heart...

So, brace yourselves gentlemen - this dudette is all set to rock IIM Bangalore :)))))))))

Pit Stop 3 - IIM Lucknow Interview (Part 5)

This blog should actually be called - "What not to do in the interview..." coz this penultimate interview in reality and the last blog of this interview series was the worst interview ever... This one was on 3rd March @ 10:00 am @ Dadar... Reaching there was no problem since I had already been there for the Bangalore interview... However, the scenes from the past haunted me (IIM B interview experiences) when I realised that this interview is also in the same room as the first one... A little scared (superstitions took over the practical mind) and completely feeling inferior (just before the GD/PI I met people with 100 percentile and 99.97 percentile which cause dmy 99.63 to look puny..) I entered the GD... The topic did not allay my fears... It was "The first myth of Management is that it exists..."... Ok, this was not only a weird topic but the people around me were so loud that this weird market turned into a fish market... Fish Market - When everyone screams and makes themselves heard but heart-of-heart know they are talking crap.... So, basically it transforms to who can make bull shit heard more in the people who are talking the same... And it did not help that the group consisted of 11 people...

Spoke something - its my nature to not keep quiet; if there is crap discussed I discussed the same, if not i let him be... Came out of the class with a completely frustrated feeling... Have you experienced that feeling when you are completely dissatisfied when you indulge in a colossal waste of time argument... Yup! thats what the feeling was outside room, after the Lucknow GD... I was 10th in the group and since the interviews were in order, I had a looooooooong wait ahead of me... But to my great surprise, every interview lasted maximum of 15 minutes and in about 1.5 hours it was my turn for the interview... I was happy that finally my turn came and I was happy... But little did I know - 'happy' was last thing that I should have felt for the kind of interview that I had...

I - Good Afternoon, so Sharmili - do you know that there is a movie of your name?
M - Yes sir!
I - who are the actors?
M - Shashi Kapoor and Rakhee
I - who is the director?
M - I dont know
I - Producer?
M - I dont know...
I - would you agree that the word 'sharmili' is used in many songs
M - yes sir!
I - so sing 3 songs with word 'sharmili' except for 'o meri sharmili'
M (well I know hajar songs - great ones, good ones and crappy ones... But suddenly I blanked out... I couldnt recollect any) ummmm...
I (waited for exactly 20 seconds and went ahead) - Ok, leave that... Sharmili I see that you have not made good use of your abilities
M - I am not sure y are you saying this.. I do not understand...
I - well you go 90 in tenth, 93 in 12th... But only 73 in engineering... You did not use being in VJTI to your advantage..
M - Sir! I have been in top 5 when I scored 90, top 5 when I scored 93 and also top 5 in engineering... So, I believe that I have utilised my potential...
I - I see you have done business french... What is it?
M - explained..
I - ok, tell me what would you say for, "I want to do business with you in French"
M (French is very confusing but I had an A grade... I was not best but this I should have got it) - Je voudrait vais business avec vous... Sir, I do not remember what is business in French... (Btw, this sentence was completely wrong... This roughly translated means I wish to go business with you... :(((...)
I - So, what is the conversion rate between rupees and francs?
M - Dont know
I - Rupees and dollars?
M - 43.95 (full to guess kiya..)
I - are you sure or just bluffing?
M - sure (I wish he had not read the paper... Later on found out it was 44.90.. I was close I thot.. Did he buy it was my next thought)
I - Infosys is taking a big loan from world bank - what is it regarding?
M (I had read that infosys is looking for an acquisition in Australia.. So, figured it would be for that purpose) Told this reason...
I - oh, so world bank gives loan to infy???
M (wanted to hit myself so badly...) Oh no sir, World bank gives loan to central banks of the countries - not individual companies...
I - Hmmm... So, who is the chief commissioner of india?
M - dont know
I - who is the deputy then?
M (thinking if I dont know this one, would I know the deputy duh!!!) - Dont know...
I - take a guess
M - Renuka Chowdhary (who I realised in few seconds after saying was Women's welfare minister...)
I - Thats wrong... But if you took her name.. tell me 3 women CEOs of the world...
M (gettting excited coz this would be first question I would answer correctly and he broke my thoughts by continuing the sentence...)
I - tell me 3 women CEOs of the world except - Indra Nooyi of Pepsico and Kiran Majumdar Shaw of Biocon...
M (laughing outwards, cursing inwards) - Sir, you took the names of all the ones I knew :(((((
I - Ok, tell me any one...
M (still couldnt answer..)
I - Which was your favourtie subject in Engg?
M (I had prepared this one..) - Logic Circuits...
I (interviewer confused... he did not expect this answer...) - Ok, Ill ask you a maths question... Gave me a 2 X 3 matrix and asked me to find the determinant...
M (now I knew, I couldn't find the determinant.. It was not possible but I could not tell the reason why... So, I tried to use my brains... (extra shanugiri is what I did in short... Thinking aloud...) Well, I cannot find the determinant.. So, I would mutiply this matrix with an identity matrix (since A*I = A) and convert it to 3 X 3 matrix...
I (an amused look on his face...) - What are you doing??? You know you are not close to giving me an answer, right...
M (completely exasperated..) - Sir, I know I can solve but there is something thats not correct... But, I cant tell you what...
I - what is the requirement for finding the determinant?
M - It should be 3 X 3 or more...
I - Right, it should be a square matrix...
M (Oh, ya.. thats what it is called... I knew it but did not know how to say it... what a rubbish thing to do...)
M - trying to still smile despite a disastrous interview...
I - ok, Sharmili you can go now... Please send the next person in...

Learnings from this Interview -
1. Know everything about your name - and if you are one of the unlucky ones like me who have a movie with the name - then God bless you!!
2. DONT show your extra smartness by thinking out of the box when its not required...
3. Smiling and laughing with the interviewer doesnt help... If you suck, you still do... The only thing that can get you out is knowing stuff
4. Stress Interview (thats what everyone told me my Lucknow interview was) doesnt work out if you dont get stressed (which was also something that everyone told me - people who have stress interviews are tested to check if they retain composure under stress)... You still need to know everything they ask...

Needless to say, you guys must have guessed by now - I did not make it through the Lucknow interview...

Pit Stop 2 - SP Jain Interview (Part 4)

SP Jain generally has a group interview.. No GD so this was good... But they have 2 group interviews... Every year they had it on the same day but this year they had it on 2 different days... One was 24th Feb @ SP Jain and the other was 24th Mar @ SP Jain again... The first one was 8 am in the morning (which I feared that I would sleep during the interview - never a morning person).. the second one was at 9:30 am (which is still decent).. What made this entire process difficult was that there were 20 seats (for the course I had applied) and around 250 - 300 calls given out for the first round...

First one - Sleep me reported dot at 8... thanks to the Virar fast which got me to Andheri in 12 minutes else I would have been late... Document cheking... I did not have my score card... Man!!! this is the second consecutive time I do not have necessary documentation... Went to the students who are arranging this and asked them if the admit card would do... They agreed.. Phew!!! That was close... I was in the first group to be called... I had 3 marketing, 2 finance, 1 operations and me (doing IM) in the group... We entered... Again a smile on my face... I was first in the group when we sat in a semicircular arrangement... So, the first question... Tell me about yourself...
M (happy that finally this question which I had prepared around 7 versions for was asked) - told
Everyone also answered...

Now, the questions were asked to one person and then passed... So, there might be no connection in both the questions...

I - Ok, sharmili - tell me your most significant achievement in work?
M - told
I - What was the failure that you had faced and what were the learnings?
M - told (actually these were from the form we filled and were asked by the student @ SP Jain)
I - Sharmili you read right... Tell me 2 things you would do to increase speed of reading?
M - First you dont read out aloud... read in the mind... Second - increase the span of your eyes... This is a long term approach but works...
I - So, your hobbies include poetry... Can we hear one of them?
M (well I know she wants to check if I am bluffing but how the hell do I remember a poetry? - Made up a poetry on the spot... ) This poem was written after the bomb blasts that recently happened in Mumbai local trains... Its about a suicide bomber...

I am sitting in a train thats about to blast
Seconds away nothing will remain - not even its cast
There is happiness, chatter and laughter around
In a few moments - there would be no sound...

(Now, I am no Wordsworth... Cannot make more than 4 lines on the spot... But the madam seemed satisfied)

I - There is a project with no process in place... You have to put a process in place... How would you go about it?
M (Giving global gyaan) - I would analyse the pain areas... Then the reasons for the pain areas (gave some examples from personal experience) Use some already existing process and customise it if possible... But if not, I'll discuss the process to be started in detail with the team members and then unanimously implement one process...

That's it... The first interview was done and it was better than IIM B, I thought... I made it through the first round
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The second round started with me taking a panga with a senior student... My interview scheduled at 9:30 did not start even at 12:00... I went to him and I said if this frustration makes my interview go bad then its your neck on the line (not that could actually happen but said it anyway)... So, finally around 12:30 my interview started and this time a group of 4 people - all from IM - went for the interview... Now this interview was more of a discussion... The professor would give a topic and would ask all the 4 of us to speak...

I - Dont you think IT is so hyped up... I mean people do not have basic necessities and all you guys do is keep talking about IT as if its a biiiiiiiig thing... IT has not helped the actual India...
M - I do not agree sir... An instance where IT has impacted and helped the masses is how banks now work... IT has automated most processes, opening an account is easier, loans are made more accessible to people which in turn helps to provide for the basic necessities you just mentioned...
I (grilled others on this and asked a new question) - What are your views on child labour?
M (before me - this other person on my panel said that youth in the city is not as aware of this as those in towns/villages.. somebody else said that this problem can never be eradicated..) (Speaking when my turn came) I disagree with both the views mentioned... I hail form a city but I work from an NGO who works on educating under privileged children... We also conduct vocational training where we help their parents get jobs thus reducing the need to getting financial help from their children... and even if this is on a small scale now, continued efforts in this direction will help address the problem of child labour...
I - Pick a political issue all over the world...
M (everyone selected one thing or the other.. I selected India-Pak tensions)
I - what is the real problem?
M - The problem stems from the Kashmir issue primarily... Emotional baggage prevents a good decision making process... Some more gyaan on this topic...
I - What do you think of all these TV Serials that have come up... What kind of effect do they have on the people?
M - They have reduced the time families have togehter... They have reduced the playing time for kids who chose to watch TV over playing... etc...
I - Tell us about your family
M - Told
I - What is your idea of God?
M - It is a force for me which makes me believe that once I put in every effort from my side then the result would be taken care of by him... It is a belief that good things will happen to me coz I am a good person...
I - You are in a church and this one person is smoking while the sermon is on... What would be your take on this situation?
M (before me people said something like he has a freedom of expression so he can smoke but he shud realise that he is disrespecting the father... Someone else said if I am there for the sermon I would pay attention to it despite the disturbance!!) - (I again disagreed with both of them)... I said that he should not be doing that since he is not only disrespecting the father but also invading other people's space by disturbing them by smoking... So, if he intends to attend the sermon he shud put out the cigarette else should go out smoke, finish it and then come to attend the sermon...

That was it... They thanked us and we left... Felt a little better after the interview but later realised 90% of the junta had similar interviews and with 20 in 400 seats chance - I did not know how should I categorise my interview...

But, I got through so I guess what I did was acceptable...

The final pit stop... the next blog...

Pit Stop 1 - IIM B Interview 14th Feb 2007 (Part 3)

What a date to have the interview :)))))) And I do not mean it in a positive way... The first drawback... In our company we have something like a leave planner where we update our leaves... So, to my luck - 2 people from the team took leave on Valentine's day... The next unfortunate thing was - it was me and another guy from the team... Oh man!!! The team had a gala time bantering, badgering and teasing the hell out of us!!! If any of you guys thought that people in big IT offices act all mature and professional then you think wrong... These guys had a field time when both of us applied for those leaves on V-day...

Anyway, moving on - I thought the first thing in the interview would be why is Valentine Day celebrated? What is your idea of celebrating this day? What do you think about Shiv sena's reactions to this day etc... Well, Wikipedia and google were very handy and all these answers were done... Then why I would select IIM B, other typical MBA questions, Infosys news (which I kept feeling appeared often as if media knew it was my interview coming up so I be max occupied), some current issues etc...

Went to the interview (scheduled at 9:00 am at Dadar) decked up in a nice salwar kameez and looking my formal best :) After reaching there, read up stock prices of Infy, Sensex closures, Headlines etc... The group was called - case study was about to begin... Said the penultimate prayer and went in... The case study was about some people going to South Pole for an expedition - basically showing the different styles of leadership... Now, this discussion in the 17th century and we were asked to give advice to the next indian leader going there... My entire prep (in the first 2 min was with this assumption) and we were all set for the discussion... Just as it started - one guy assumed that this advice is present day and he pointed out a gamut of devices that can be used... And the whole group discussed that... Shit!!! I have no points - panic set in... Ordinarily, I can get groups' attention - I could have said we can look at it from this POV - but some mental block just debilitated me... I did not say anything... I was pretending to listen intently (coz we had to write the summary individually later) but racking my brain for a new point... 15 minutes passed and I realised that I have had a not so good GD... Tried to maximise in the written summary and wrote all points (MoM writing during telecons helped me here)

We came out (I was fourth to be interviewed) and I was trembling... Was it coz the AC intensity was high or was it coz of my performance in the GD - I do not know... But next hour or so went in calming myself... Read up all the papers present there... People came out and everyone pounced on them to ask what kind of questions were asked.. RG giri (a very IIM B concept - not helping or rather misleading your competitors) started here itself - coz they were very vague... Did not give proper questions... My turn came in - prayers again and I went in... A nice smile on my face...

Prof to me (looking through my documents) - "You have not got your degree certificate..."
Smile went away - color drained off my face...
What crap!! (in my mind) - Oh, is it (to the prof).. "Actually I checked the list and this was not specifically mentioned... I am sorry"... Prof - "Dont be sorry, just make sure your certificate copy reaches the institute asap..."

Ok, so tell me - What is the optimisation that you hav done in your project?
M (ok this is my turf :)...) - Some gyaan about reduction in time of delivery...
I - explain in detail
M - did that....
I - why management now - after 2.5 years at Infosys...
M (again happy that he asked something I had prepared) - Global gyaan on how betterment of profile, better opportunities etc..
I - So, how many of the founders of Infosys are managers?
M (first time cursing my company founders for not doing an MBA) - I said none...
I - Oh, there you go - it is not needed...
M - I said it was not that competitive then... It is very competitive now and this gives me an edge...
I - Oh, is it.. So, do u imply that in this generation NRN and others would not be as successful
M (getting defensive) - No! I did not intend to doubt their acumen...
I - Ok, let it go Sharmili!! So, if this is so important then why doesnt Infosys start a Mgmt Institute?
M - Coz it is a S/W IT company... the requirement is more for SW and not the managers...
I - Do you know Infosys is recruting people aggressively?
M - Yes, we just had a batch of 2000 people join Mysore DC (this was total fart...)
I - So, just as they have a prog where 4 years of engg is condensed into 4 months, they can have 2 yrs of mgmt condensed into 2 months and produce managers itself... Why wudnt they do that?
M - mgmt is a genralist stream.. The only reason they could condense this training coz it is stream specific... They only teach one stream and not the entire engg syllabus... But his cannot happen in mgmt...
I - Rubbish - Why would a HR guy need financial knowledge?
M - Coz he needs the knowledge of balance sheet to know how much he can spend on HR policies...
I - Ok, Marketing guy - why would he need Finance gyaan?
M - Same reason... He would need to know how much can he spend on his campaigns...
I - Just let it be Sharmili - you are not going anywhere with this... Ok, now tell me how has being in Infosys helped you evolve...
M - I have got the technical knowledge as a trainee, a testers knowledge in my first project (how I need to be thorough etc), and team skills as a team lead...
I - give examples?
M - gave
I - ok! tell me one thing... If you work for more than required hours in IT industry would you do a better job?
M - More hours need not mean good work... But if utilised properly it would translate to more work YES!
I - Ok, so when you hear that India is a services country... Her manufacturing sector is weak - then why do we not use this policy and help our manufacturing sector grow?
M - It does not only depend on the Labour factor... Utilisation of machines, demand of H/W etc all influence and hence we cannot use this model...
I - Ok, leave that too... Tell me, what is the advice you would give Nandan Nilekani to improve infosys?
M - I have seen that the rate at which people in company are growing - infrastructure is not... So, this results in many disappointments and hence reduced motivation levels.. At no point do I say stop recruiting but this skewed ratio of development needs to be addressed
I - What infrastructure is needed? Computers are getting smaller... (then he himself says) May be the people are gettting bigger... (laughs.. me join in too)
M - second reason is that if resource alignment... It is not addressed properly and hence it affects motivation levels again which results in bad work... Like freshers are in large number but trained on platforms differnt from the ones they are working on... Middle level management is extremely in low numbers etc.
I - Dont you think adhering to values is an issue?
M - I do not see that... I, myself, follow the company ethos with rigor...
I - Ok, tell me who would follow more rules? Senior Mgmt or Juniors?
M - Senior Mgmt..
I - Then dont you think this should be answered?
M - But this stems from dissatisfaction and that is due to reasons above...
I - But still you should enforce values... So, Sharmili you are into Social Service...
M (getting happy coz he again entered my domain... it was like a lalllu ball which I would toss for a sixer) - Yes
I - Tell me the names of 2 social reformers from Maharashtra
M (in my mind) - What??? Social reformers??? Names.. Names... (to the prof) Please give me a minute... I should be able tosay something..
M - Baba Amte (thanks to the tenth standard lesson... I remebered)
I - Good, so what does he do??
M (completely blank now... I remebered the lesson, its name, his name but no hint about what he did... Took a random guess) - He cleans (Man, what a lame answer...)
I - Cleans what???
M (thinking - arre wah, my guess was right... he does clean) - Streets - He cleans streets (crossing fingers)
I - No, No... I think you are mixing him with someone else... Ok, what about the second one...
M (gave up) - I really dont remember now...
I - Does the name Anna Hazare ring any bell???
M (well I did hear about him) - I have heard about him..
I - good, tell me what he does now?
M (arre, yeh mujhe mera kaam chhodke kya pooch raha hai?) - No clue sir...
I - ok, does <> (i dont remeber what he said - but it was some drive name that Anna Hazare has started) ring any bells?
M - No (my faking had gone too far... couldnt risk this now)
I - Ok, last question Sharmili... How badly do you want IIM B?
M (should I give a smart answer, a witty reply, an earnest reply??? think think think.. couldnt come up with anything funny or witty so just said) VERY BADLY sir...
I - thanks Sharmili, please sned the next one in...

And I came out... people pounced on me too... No presence of mind questions, no silly questions, no current affairs questions... Plain simple - they wanted to know me...

Did I give them a satisfying answer to their query? Did they think I was capable? Frankly, then I did not think so... All, I could remember were the mistakes I did and how I could have answered this better...

But I guess I did give them something concrete... Coz I converted the call... :)

Qualifying Rounds - (Part 2)

This section is the preparation for the actual interview... I had a series of mock interviews... The experience proved only one thing... That I am a very contradictory person - based on the answers I gave in the interviews... In one mock interview I was boring and in the other I was interesting... In one I was extremely clear about my career path in others I was silly and had no clue where my life was heading to... Given below are some excerpts from my interviews (of course the interesting ones - mainly where I acted silly)

Interviewer (hereon referred to as I) - So, Sharmili who is the vice president of India?
Me (hereon referred to as M) - Bhairao Singh Shekhavat(BSS)...
I - Sharmili, its late BSS...
M (gasping) - Oh!!! I did not know...
I - So, sharmili who is the VP of India???
M (confidently this time) - Late BSS...

Interviewer couldn't ROTFLOL (roll on the floor laughing out loud) otherwise he would have... All he said was Sharmili since when are ghosts presiding on important chairs...
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I - What is your favorite subject?
M - Maths
I - ok, tell me the remainder when you divide -17 by 3
M - remainder is -2
I - So, sharmili if this is the state of affairs in your fav subject then I wonder what it would be in the non-fav ones...

This came from the person who got a 98.50 percentile in Maths... Just for the benefit of those who are strongly on my side and think answer is correct - then no it isn't... Answer is 1... Remainder is defined as the first positive number after you divide which is less than divisor... So, 3 * -6 = -18 which gives remainder 1 for -17...
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I - what is the average annual income of an Indian?
M - 2500 USD (guessed)
I - well, if that were the case sharmili - we would not be called a developing country

Later on I found out it is 2500 Rupees = 350 USD... There is a limit to faking man!!!
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Of course there were management interview specific questions like - Why do you want management? How would you describe yourself? etc... I am not writing about them coz I knew those and I could crack them decently and would not be interesting reads....

There was others like where I was asked my idol, my role model, basketball dimensions (how will this make me a better manager??), conversion of inch to centimeter(yes, because at some point in time every manager needs to use this), how many steps I took before coming to the room (do you not realise that when a manager goes for any presentation the first question is how many steps did he climb...), how will I manage my personal and professional life after marriage(I wonder why only girls are always asked this question??? I mean, dont guys marry too??? What makes them better at managing personal and professional life??? Is it a fact or just assumed since we are a male dominated society??), mention all the stations between Virar and Borivli - in order (I want to tell them that if I really become a manager - 99% I would not be in that area and even if I am placed there then I would use a car ;)....) etc....

First set of questions - a sensible and an intelligent person should not answer the way I did... Wonder why my brain just blocked sensible responses and gave out completely dumb answers...

Second set of questions - no longer an indicator coz most of the students prepare this so well that you cannot make out who is being genuine and true and who is fake and rehearsed...

Third set of questions - I know it is for checking the presence of mind or how do they candidates react to stressful situations... I agree it is important for a manager but I still dont think this is a good way to check... Atleast I was flabbergasted to suddenly move from Indian economy to what is the dimension of the basketball court... And clearly this showed in the confidence levels with which I answered this question...

The learnings from every interview were - I am terrible, I have low confidence levels, I cannot lie - since my eyes reveal it, I need to work on my current affairs, I need to work on academic subjects, I speak in a roundabout manner etc... This evaluation, in a way, helped me since I did not become complacent - I kept working on my answers, working on my foibles...

But I keep wondering is would I be better prepared for the interview if I had one good post interview evaluation???

The actuals coming up in the next blog....

Race that began a loooong time ago!! (Part 1)

This statement is not to suggest that Narayan Kartikeyan has competition in F1 race!!! But the race that I mention is the 'rat-race' that I was a part of for good three years of my life... Some magazine mentioned that by 2020 one in every 5 people would be an MBA or would have taken the exam for MBA...

I have contributed to these statistics for quite some time now... I have taken b-school exams for different institutes... Sometimes did not clear the exam, sometimes cleared the exam but not the interview, sometimes both... I had decided that this year was going to be the last year I take this exam - CAT... I have been trying to bell the CAT; but for some strange reason - it kept going further away from me - like a mirage... So, finally I decided that my perseverance (which is my strength) needs a check and practicality (displayed very rarely) should get priority...

Thus, geared up for the exam - one last time... Always thought that 10th maths and basic english could never be so difficult... And it came as a surprise to me when I actually needed 3 attempts to clear this exams despite toiling hard... I have first hand experience which prove that 10th and 12th boards were easy... And with time my intelligence should have grown making it even easier to crack this exam that was based on this syllabus... But, it just did not happen...

So, finally D-day arrived and I took the test... Every year, I checked my score - analysed - referenced - cross referenced... The scoreboard showed the following:

Year 1 - 99.32 percentile - two calls - not converted
Year 2 - 96 percentile - less said about it the better...

So, this year no analysis was done... Frankly did not even understand how the paper was... And did not make an effort too... Call it superstition or whatever... Finally, one unexpected day the results were out... The updated scoreboard had one more entry

Year 3 - 99.63 percentile - 3 calls... Fate still to be decided...

What was different, what clicked, what worked??? Now after the results, I can answer this - as an afterthought... But definitely not after the exams...

Thereafter prepared for interviews... For that section read on the next blog...

We live in 'Present' or 'Past'

This blog may be well beyond the purview of an engineer whose only experience is in the IT field but yet I would like enter the realms of the mind. I would like to explore the unexplored depths of the power of the past over the present or even the future. This topic is something that most psychiatrists work on for a major part of their life. And I have no doubts that neither can I match their proficiency nor their expertise on "how human mind adapts to experiences from the past?" Therefore the content of this blog, I would confine to my experiences - involving other people or involving me - and ken of my knowledge.

Case 1 - I get wronged in past so I wrong the people in present to seek revenge...
This is a section which mainly belongs to the serial killers n psychopaths... I have read many articles on how they are made. These articles were omnipresent (and also caused a spark of interest in junta) when we had cases of beer man killing rampantly in the city or that of cannibals in the country... Most of these articles stated the same observations... These people have traumatic experiences in the past, get abused and thus believe that the only way to undo the wrong is by seeking revenge... result - what they experienced, they make others experience... Not only do they have extremely justifiable reasons for this but also a flawless method of execution and marking their victim... They have no empathy, remorse, anxiety or guilt in relation to their behavior. In short, they truly are devoid of conscience. However, they understand that society expects them to behave in a conscientious manner, and therefore they mimic this behavior when it suits their needs.
Further reference - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychopaths

Case 2 - I want my kids to be what I couldn't be
This is something I came across while I was reading Erich Segal's novel - "Doctors"... A kid commits suicide when he cannot come in the top ranks of the class.... He succumbs to peer pressure and kills himself coz he cannot fail... On further investigation of this suicide - comes a startling discovery... His father did not come in top ranks during his lifetime... And wanted his son to do so... So badly that if his son failed he was whipped... So, to make his father love him, the son set to accomplish his dream... And when he failed, he couldn't face it and killed himself... In this case, you reach a point where you fail to live upto the image of your parents' past that was created for you since your childhood... With the increase in competition, the number of suicides has always increased... May be each individual was a victim of this case... As a student, I did live in my parents past too but somewhere my father eased the pressure by being extremely understanding...

Case 3 - I live in anti-past... I am traumatised/disgraced by it and want to live a life completely opposite to it
This is something I have actually experienced in my life... I was in third standard when I pronounced something incorrectly and the whole class laughed at me... Trauma - is a relative term... For some it would be a loss of someone dear, for others it could be a harrowing experience... At the age of 10 years, the class laughing at me was traumatic for me... So, unconciously I placed a lot of importance on pronunciations in present... I would argue, go at lengths to find out the right pronounciation - which to a normal person seemed fanatical... But that was me, trying to be perfect in pronunciation - an 'anti-past' life in the present.... Similarly, different people have different ways of reacting to this case... Some will take learnings from a broken relationship in the past and do everything possible to do something contradictory in the new one... Some get ridiculed for say, thing A and result would be that you either know in-out about A or go so much away from A that it doent bother your life anymore...

At this point in time, I have seen or read about only these cases... Are there more ? - Certainly but I have not experienced them... But, what I do realise after seeing 3 cases is that you should try to not place so much importance on the past deeds... Goals that are missed, experiences that have resulted in loss - monetary, physical, emotional or status related... Consciously avoid it and definitely if it is having a -ve impact... All you need from the past is the learning - not a reason for your survival in the present, not something that you have to work on in present... Just a thot...

"Make each day count... Do not waste it on doing things from past but plan for the future and live for the PRESENT!!!!

Very Inspiring

FWDs are something that an IT professional does to while away his time when he is on 'bench'.... For the fortunate souls not in IT, "on bench" is a term used by us when we have fought to get a person allocated to our project but have realised that we have no work for him.... So, effectively what happens is that he comes to office, warms the chairs and then goes away happily at 5:00 in the evening.... In the process of warming his benches, he sends/checks forwards... chain mails, inspiring mails, jokes, blogs etc... One such inspiring mail when i was on pseudo project (psued way of saying on bench) is the one below....

Dunno what I liked about it... the cute girl, the simple message or just the fact that the message was very relevant to me at that point in time... Hope you guys like it tooo.... And be brave... (if you dont get this - its coz u havent read the content below yet :)....)

Inaction breeds doubt and fear.
Action breeds confidence and courage.
If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it.
Go out and get busy.
Take chances, make mistakes.
That's how you grow.
Pain nourishes your courage.
You have to fail in order to practice being brave.

Mothers - You can never predict their reactions!!!

No!!! this is not a blog on the mahanta of mothers... It is definitely not to impress the importance of mothers in a person's life... Coz, there are no words that can do justice to that... And there is not a single article that can cover all the points of the greatness of the beings called 'mothers'... This blog is about how inspite of living with this person for about 24 years of my life, I have not been able to foresee her reactions!!! This is about how 'Mothers' can surprise you with their actions - right when you feel that you know her and can predict her reactions.... Inspite of having being born from within them, inspite of knowing them all your life, despite confiding in them as a friend, philosopher and guide - they continue to amaze us... I know many mothers in my life (my friends mothers, aunts etc) but mine is the queerest of the lot :))))))) (Well most kids would have the same opinion, I believe)

So, Mrs. Shital Phulgirkar became a mother of this terror called Sharmili when she was just 22 years old... And from that point on, not only has she guided me thru the 24 years of my life but has been my greatest strength and my closest aide... When I was 22 I threw tantrums and was as immature as a school kid - but my mother, at that age, ensured that I was groomed well... She made me learn - taught me - helped me transform into a socially responsible, intelligent individual... During these years, I have also tried to understand her.... I have known her to be a mature, sensitive person who cries when someone dies in a movie.... I know her as a very reasonable person who is extremely adaptable to change... Thus I never had to worry about generation gap when it came to her... I know her as a person who respects the value of education and the value of her values... A person who knows when to give space and knows when it is necessary to encroach on it... And most importantly, one who always kept her family's well being above her.... Thus, knowing these characteristics about her should give me a fair idea of how she would react to a situation right... But sadly, it doesnt!!!Coz, this lady continues to amaze me with her responses...

I was in school and I wanted to join Karate classes... No reason why she shouldn't allow me right!! But she refused - reason - I might get hands on practise of Karate moves on my sisters... A valid concern - yes - but would I really do it? And even if I did (kids at that age are dumb) wont she successfully stop me??? But "NO" was all I got... During my tenth standard I was supposed to go for a 3 day camp with other girls.. Now, tenth standard is a crucial year so I had expected her to refuse directly... She asks me if she sees this as something that can affect my studies... Eager to go to the camp, I assured her that it wont... And she agreed.. Just like that... In college, I wanted to go to a movie with my friends after the exams... Not a big deal I thought - may be she would give me time constraints, type of movie constraints... But she refused... Whatever were her reasons then, but it was a very small thing and she surprised me by refusing... It was a reaction which I hadnt expected... After about 4 years, around the same time, my sister who was in tenth standard (still in school) asked her permission for going to a movie with friends and she agreed... I guess on some level she opened up to this concept - realised that she was being unreasonable or a tad bit overprotective (and thank God for that)... A trip to Goa was planned... 5 days!!! 20 people which included only 6 girls... I was sure that my mother, who did not allow me to go to a movie with guys, would never concede to me going to Goa... But guess what, she was one of the first mothers to agree to send me there :))))))

I am now a professional... I am independent and she respects that... But she still is an integral part of my decision making process.... So, I wanted to taste Breezer (translated to Alchohol for her inspite of chintu percentage of alchohol in it) on the eve of International Women's day!!! There was a Pajama Party in my house and I just wanted to be a good hostess by giving my guests company... Of course, before asking her I had told my friends that I would not be drinking (anticipation of her reaction)... You cannot possibly go and ask your mother - "Mom, we have a pajama party and I want to indulge in drunken revelry (which would be her interpretation)..." But I still dared... I mean when you expect a NO already, it becomes easier to handle responses... Atleast I would have been happy about the fact that I tried... So, I dailed the number and asked her - only to be stunned for whole 2 minutes... She agreed... She said, "so long as you know your limits - I do not have any issues..." HOW COOL IS MY MOM :)))))))))) Of course, I did not get drunk that day - just tasted a lil of breezer and then slept off... But the fact that she agreed makes me respect her immensely....

And a final thing that made me write this entire blog... That incident would require some background knowledge... My mom never allows either of her daughters to travel alone.. She gets paranoid... becomes a worry-wart till the person reaches the destination or back home... So, I was 90% sure that she would disagree and reject the proposal of me going to Singapore alone to meet my friend... Undeterred, I did not try a round about approach but a direct question "Should I go?"... And by now you guys must have guessed what she said... She said "Of course, you can... If you think you can handle being in a foreign country and get all the formalities done before the time you can go?" this was like an icing on the cake... A person who dint allow me to go to Shimla alone, allowed me to go to Singapore... Of course the trip is still in the offing but its a great feeling that my mother actually took a decision that agrees with me :)))))))))

So, I present people - my mother... Who sometimes acts as if she is from the 22nd century and is all liberal... And sometimes as if she is from the 14th century and is parochial in everything she does... But, inspite of all this I adore her (everyone adores their mothers)... I love her immensely and I do not see anyone who can meaure up to her persona... If I am even one tenth of what she is; my daughter/son would turn to me as I turn to her and be as proud of me as I am of her...

It takes one mother to know how any other mother would function and decide... As a daughter, I have a tried to understand her and predict her actions... I am not 100% successful but may be someday in future, I would do that successfully (after I become a mother myself)!!!!!!!!!

Alchemist versus Murphy

"Whatever can go wrong will go wrong, and at the worst possible time..." Sounds familiar? Righly guessed - our very own Murphy's law... I am certain that most of us have been victims of the validity of this law... For instance, how many of us badly want to reach on time and got stuck in a traffic jam or fell ill when we had an important interview, a fully planned outing or a party to attend... Leads me to believe that most of us have experienced the regularity of this irregular law... And for strangest reasons this law always gets applicable to me... My plans are always minute by minute when I have to meet my friends - meaning there is no concept of buffer time to allow inexplicable delays... Those timelines would work 99.9% of the times (which speaks of the efficient time management) but say I want to really be on time for this party thingy and this party would inevitably fall in that 0.1% zone making it impossible for me to reach there on time... And then people accuse me of being tardy... What they dont get is that it's Murphy conspiring against me... :)))))))

Reading is one of my hobbies like that of zillion others... I like Fantasy fiction in particular but I am open to reading any book, if someone recommends it... So, while reading this one highly recommended book I came across this sentence - "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it..." When Paulo Coelho took us through the journey of Santiago in The Alchemist most of the people just believed him... A story wrought with fortune tellers, dreams, travel and hardwork the story does seem believable... But what I liked the most about this book is the strong message it sends - dare to dream...

But reading this line just made my life more confusing... I managed to find ample examples of Murphy's law and its relevance in my life but I just couldn't get anything for The Alchemist Law... Could it happen that 2 laws with universal applicability are just not applicable to me... These seemingly contradictory laws that govern the universe but not my life... So, here I was; trying to find out how to relate these laws to my life :-
One which said - if there was one way to go wrong, you will go that way
One which said - if you are on a way, whole universe will conspire to lead you the right goal...
I am neither bold enough to question the validity of these laws nor am I foolish to ignore them... In an effort to find a resolution, I stumbled on this line in wikipedia about Murphy's laws and I realised where I was going wrong... It said that interpretation of Murphy's laws depends on one's outlook and attitude... One interpretation is sour and the other is an affirmation of the predictable being able to be surmounted, usually by sufficient planning and redundancy... This same rule applies to other laws as well...

Then was it that my interpretation was incorrect of these laws??? Was it because of my outlook that I got confused??? I mean my pessimism clouded my life so much that I refused to see the brighter side of Mr. Murphy... When all the time I blamed him for making laws that govern everything that went wrong in my life, I failed to see the learning... The learning to make sure that the things that went wrong once; could be avoided the next time... And working on these lines, I would have eventually reached a stage that would have led whole universe to conspire to give what I wanted outta life...

Thus, every law just fit perfectly... What I kept thinking were contradictory laws actually complemented each other, enmeshed deeply within the power of interpretation.... And this interpretation was the very basis of every law that came into existence... Newton interpreted the "Apple falling on his head" and made a Law of gravity... Einstein wanted to interpret behaviour of particles at speed of light and formulated Law of Relativity etc...

So, having interpreted this, will my life become easier hereon??? Will I finally reach the stage where the only law applicable to me is that of The Alchemist's??? I do not know but I am atleast happy that I figured something constuctive instead of plainly cursing Murphy all the time when things went wrong...

Wondering -

There is a constant fight that always goes on between logic and emotions, between reason and religion, between the heart and the brain and plethora other yin-yang forces... Yin - the bright optimistic subjective side and yang - the factual, cold and pessimistic side... What I am wondering is when do I know which force am I supposed to listen to? And even if I do decide on one force, how do I know it is correct?

Logic tells me that India's chances of winning the world cup are slim but faith (or rather blind faith) makes me watch each match with enthusiasm... On the other hand, my heart tells me to take a bike and go to Goa but brain tells me that the idea is not only weird but also not viable....

If there is something I desperately want or someone I desperately want to be with and the odds are not in favour of that taking place, what will I do? Will I still hold on to the thing/person based on only subjective parameters which I want to believe in (and want them to be true under any circumstances) or should I just take statistics into account and forget all about it? One- is this easy and Two - is this correct?

Thus, comes a conundrum which I am faced with time and again. When do I listen to something that cannot be substantiated and lacks substance and when do I go to facts and let them have the final word??? And what happens if I listen to the one I am not supposed to and end up making a huge mistake or just raising my hopes in vain which would then lead to a crash....

At this point in time, I am unsure of my very purpose in life, my future and my goals... I am confused as to what and where I would be like in 5 years down the line.... This uncertainty makes me want to predict my future - something that I believe is basic human nature.... But I have had so many predictions by now that I am as lost as I was at the start of the exercise...
Therefore all I can say is, I have finally succumbed to the inevitable forces of fate and destiny....

A sane person with a perfectly logical POV and rationality has just decided to leave some of my very critical decisions to abstract parameters... to fate, God, destiny etc when I have the power to shape up my own... Am I imbeccile then??? But all I know at this point in my life is that, no facts and rationales can later on answer or explain the vagaries these uncontrollable factors enforce on your life...

Is this the right thing to do - I do not know - I am still wondering!!!

Its simple to be happy but difficult to be simple

I heard Rajesh Khanna say this sentence in Bawarchi, "Its simple to be happy but difficult to be simple" and my brain got food for thought! Why is it difficult to be simple? Is it because we lack the basic definition of 'Being Simple'? This is how my definitions for 'Being Simple' varied over the period of time.

Definition 1: Simple is someone who isnt extravagant. Someone who lives a life within his reach. Someone who isn't brand conscious and does not indulge in frivolity.

This led me to believe that being simple is being someone who has a decent income, is usually wise with money and would not spend 2000 bucks on shoes or 15000 for dinner at Taj. I fit the bill when I was in college. I was all the above and more. I was also socially responsible (meaning I gave back to society whenever I got a chance), I would spend time with friends and family (mostly indoors or once in a while a Shiv Sagar restaurant for special occassions) and was a part of the missed call giving people (so not too high mobile bills). Was it because I was a student with lack of funds and did not want to burden my father with unnecessary demands or was I really simple?

But then I joined the IT industry and I became the part of the yuppy 'gen next' people with cash on hands. I gifted my sister with a cell, my mother with gold set and a microwave, my father with the music system (branded) for our car, went to concerts, got my hair straightened at a branded parlour(which is a very expensive thing to be done) and I have lost the count of how many parties I have been to. Does that mean I am no longer simple? On the same lines we can then say that - a person who earns say 50 bucks in a day and spends 25 bucks on desi daru would be more simple than say a person who earns 15000 a month and spends 250 on a glass of champagne. Can we really equate monetary strength and standard of living with simplicity? Am I not the same person around 3 years ago? If I am (which I am certain of) then why do people around me feel that I am no longer simple. Stumps me and so it makes me want to change the definition of being simple - just the way scientists would do - one theory failed so develop a new one which supports the existing phenomenon.

Definition 2:Simple is someone who is not complicated. Someone who does things in a simple way, someone who has a simple funda in life - I speak my mind and I am clear about issues in my life.

Fairly direct I would say. Thus, a simple person then would mean who is honest and forthright, someone who leads the life their way(irrespective of standard of living), Thus, I could wear expensive Nike shoes and yet be simple. I can tell what things upset me and what dont. What issues I can handle and what I cannot. I can decide how much I spend and how much I can indulge. I dont have to worry about hajar parameters that could affect my living. Thus, an uncomplicated life - and so I am simple. And this definition makes yours truly simple with or without money. But this also makes all business men not simple - they have to worry about profits, markets, prices, reforms etc - and this I agreed to. This made politicians and people in media not simple which was my idea too. But, this definition made Mother Teressa not simple - since she had to keep worrying about many issues in life and did many very complicated things which a normal person could not do. This was something that made me want to change this definition. Mother Teressa is simplicity incarnate. So, if a definition doesn't include her as simple ought to be changed.

Definition 3: Its your ideas, your purpose in life and your character that you have make you simple. And it is possible that you alter your character and still remain simple.

Hmmm... This one looks fine... Business men are simple because they have a simple purpose - profit and so long as they are not criminals. Mother Teressa is because she wanted social reform and went to any length to bring about betterment if her people. I am simple because I want to live my life according to my means, have fun alongwith being responsible and stick to my core set of values. This definition kinda includes everyone doesnt it. And yes it is difficult now to be simple because
- not everyone can pass every test their character is put up against
- not everyone can be focussed on the purpose of their life all the time
- and not everyone always have clear ideas in every situation because life has this uncanny knack of confronting you with most unexpected ones

And the Argument Continues....

International Women's Day - 8th March.... We gals decided to spend this day by indulging ourselves... We dressed up in our best, were going to go out in the evening and booze and watch F.R.I.E.N.D.S all night long... So, with this entire plan fixed from around 3 days ago; we came to office on 8th March - all excited.... Huged each other, wished each other and complimented on how we were looking all stunning :)... Later in the day, an inconsequential action of a fella forwarding a mail about the importance of Women's day to the guys of the group, started a war of words.... The battle of sexes.... Mails were exchanged and power of words was used to kill... An excerpt from the argument:-

The forward (Deepti) said something like God is definitely a man coz he does some things (like not listening, he has a final word etc) which a man does and women are angels coz they care and make world a better place to live in... So, happy women's day to all God's angels...

reply 1 (Kartik) : Lol… We are so the image of God…I’m God.. God is great :)
And btw.. I fail to understand this women’s day concept.. Do the women want to be noticed only today???? Are all the other days man days?? Calvin fans … Today is a good day to exercise G.R.O.S.S (which incidentally means Get Rid Of Slimy girlS)

reply 2 (Stella) : U guys are so pathetic…..so bad tht u do not hv a day decicated to men….how come no day dedicated for the MEN????......ill tell u y….cause ur not worth it…… :)
N just for the record... u r not GOD…neither are u created in God’s image…DEVILS!!!....n created in devil’s image n likeliness……

reply 3 (Siddharth) : GOD or DEVILS…still v r revered…

reply 4 (Kartik) :
Every dog has its day...
But MEN don’t have a day dedicated to them…
But today is Women’s day..
So women have a day dedicated to them
Hence proved that ………………… :)))))))

reply 5 (Sharmili - was not active since was not at my desk... Pounced on the opportunity to argue) : International Men’s day is February 23rd…. the logic given by Kartik is more befitting for this day since the genders match too :) Also, its pitiful… These ignorant souls do not know they have a day for themselves…
Being commonplace comes with a heavy price – IGNORANCE!!!!!
About the God thing!! I dunno what gender s/he is!!!
But what I do know is that First god created man and then he got a BETTER idea :))))
From Wikipidea, the day is copied from women and is not even international like ours is :)))))

reply 6 (Kartik) :
Deepti: God is a male.
Sharmili: “About the God thing!! I dunno what gender s/he is!!!”

The above 2 statements just proves that females cant agree on nething… I wont be surprised if Stella comes up with any other logic…Ohh…God definetly didn’t do a good job the second time… I think God also suffers from beginner’s luck ( ref: The Alchemist)… the second time the enthu just wasn’t there….

reply 7 (Stella) :U didn’t celebrate casue u didn’t know it…..Seriously miserable souls…ur just existing…not lliving ur life…. Look at us… being a woman …v r so proud of it….tht we want to celebrate it n let ppl know……
U know the saying na……Man was a draft…woman was the final masterpiece…..Wish god had destroyed the draft after the masterpiece…..
No jhol…no tension…..n it wud have been a real blessing

reply 8 (Sharmili) :
Please let us agree to one Universal Truth - Men exist coz of Women...
So if we are what Kartik is trying to prove we are – then guys just follow the suit :)))))
I like what was said in Jurassic park –
God made Man,
Man made dinosaurs…
Dinosaurs killed Man
And woman rule the world :))))
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Of course this reply wasnt left unanswered... The darker sex had something to say which resulted in more mud slinging....

As always, this small argument made me think and blog it.... I wondered to myself what makes the guys indulge in this mud slinging?? How can they ignore the fact that they have always seen their mothers do so many things which their fathers dont do... I love my father and he has ensured us security through all turbulent times... He has a pivotal role to play in what I am today and where I am today.... But when its 2 am in the morning and my stomach starts hurting or I cant sleep, the person I think of is my mother... Is higher EQ (which mothers/women are supposed to have) the only reason for that?? I dont think so... Its just what my mother symbolises... Hajar patience and hajar caring attitude... I am sure all guys have gone to their mothers time and again... If not mothers then its a wife... Thus, despite this knowledge how do men still undermine the position of women in society? Is this society called a male dominated society for any reason other than their higher numbers? A man learns alone but a woman educates the family is an axiom now for betterment of families... Then why are states still grappling with female foeticide, dowry deaths (though I believe they have reduced), low sex ratio, bad treatment of the girl child??? Just celebrating Women's Day internationally is really not making anyone aware of the importance of women... It has become a day for having some activities for the elite strata of the society... A get together similar to one we girls are indulging in... Of course not to add the guy bashing we all resorted to... And if the significance of this day gets restricted to this, I have to say that the battle between sexes will only continue....

Rang Barse!!!!

This Holi I experienced how this festival of colors not only makes you colorful (coz of the layers of colours on u) but also ur life... it gives you a perspective... This is a narrative of a day which gave me a positive outlook towards life and exposed the wild side of seemingly normal and civilised people :))))

Every holi (I can recollect) I have played with my school friends. And every holi with them - had no plans, no organisation and no coordination. That's the deal with my school friends.... They are the most unorganised group I am in but also those with whom I have max fun. Probably being with them during my formative years; is how I get my funda of 'On the Spot' fun :))) Never doubting that planning makes it much easier to have fun but I still like this element of uncertainty and spontaneity. Although, I wont deny that this very behaviour has also gotten to me a couple of times. Anyway, after having a horrible week and an even more terrible interview, I wasnt really looking forward to Holi!!! I mean how much of a difference can a couple of colors and some water make (yes! i was at my pessimism best).

Due to the lunar eclipse the previous day, I had to have a bath the first thing in the morning (some mythological thing my mother believes in)...
So, the scene is - its Sunday, I am tentatively going to play holi (tentatively coz I dint get thru Gaurang's number and I had no clue what the plan was) (Also playing holi wud necessitate having a bath again) and I am getting up early and having a bath... It shouldnt be a big deal I know, but all who know me would understand my harrowing experience ;) Laters, all chintu-pintu of the building, dressed up in their worst, went to play holi... fearing that I would mother them and spoil their fun I refused to go down to play with them... Then a group of Auntys came and pulled me outta house... And here I was drenched and pink + blue + black on me... And then just like that school gang made an appearance!!!

they were sporting yellow, red and all possible colors... after ensuring that we all look like the band of brothers (and sisters) we set to wish everyone's parents.... walking with them was fun, just catching up on lost time (we rarely talk to each other so often...) we went to Tejal deeds house, then to Girish's house and followed by Manoj's house in the same bldg... As usual, girish - the socialite had hajar places to go and hence we were supposed to watch time - which again we never do... Sheetal didi was without Vishal Jiju - so she was at her nuttiest best... she starts tearing Sunil's shirt for some reason (which she later explained as trying to find places to put colors)... Naturally we joined her (we rarely get to do that :)..) then came Mithun's shirt and Girish too (whose tee was very strong and we cudnt tear - this madu actually pays well for his clothes :)...) Not satisfied with this, she went organic... There was mango shake that Girish's mom served which was thrown all over us... Thandai served met the same fate.... Tired of Sheetal Didi's wild wild behaviour we decided to give her a taste of her own medicine... Me and Shivangi dragged her (later Girish carried her) to a place full of muck and she with her branded capris (which she kept cribbing abt later) were completely immersed... No wonder they say revenge is sweet :)))) A quickie to Gaurang's place where finally mud was removed and we looked more civilised than nomads :))))

After this the only this that came to my mind - Can married women have wilder fun only in absence of their counterparts? The sheer difference in the way Tejal deeeds and Sheetal deeeds played Holi made this so apparent.. Would I too do the same? Is it society that expects you to do it or is it the fact that u conciously remind urself that u r mature and responsible? Well men still seem to have wild fun after marriage too...

The school group dispersed and I went to a rain dance party with my junior college group... Music (loud and fast - my kind), water flowing and I suddenly felt light, relieved... Felt that the weight of the world does not reside on my shoulders... Dunno if it was the people or the place... went to priya's place later to wish her mom n sister (a ritual I do every year).... Finally when i came home it was arnd 3 pm and food was waiting for me... I was so famishd that i had lunch without cleaning off the colors, mango shake, thandai, muck (remains only) from myself (Yuck!! is the only response I got from anyone who knew this) Thus, effectively HOLI which reluctantly started at 10:00 am, finished only at 5:00 pm (after a bath which took one hour)... So, much for not wanting to play holi :)))))))

What actually made the difference? Was it meeting so many people (going thru the same trials and tribulations), just talking to them? Holi colors? Music which always acts as a healer? Or was it just a break from the monotony that my life has been sujected to? Was it that for once I was carefree, forgot all that could go wrong and just had wild fun, plain no strings attached fun???

Evening too we had some games in the building where I made aunties run (some game we kids and all moms played) and we played antakshari between the 2 generations (which was not concluded... they had a huge repository of old songs and we had old (thanks to remixes) and new ones) I realised towards the fag end of the day, I was more responsive, more responsible and started a fresh evening with an even more fresh outlook... tried to sort out my issues, treated myself to good music and sitcoms and helped my sister with her studies... Its been 4 days and the effect still hasnt worn off.... Somewhere the pessimist in me has gone under the layers... Will it surface again? I know that it will... Will I tackle it again - I know I will - but may be it wont be holi this time....

Bottomline - Changes are necessary... Either in form of doing something different or interacting with someone different... Just the thought that others go through the shit that you are going through makes you face ur fears and inhibitions boldly... On the other hand being in a monotonous life just brings negative energies on the table - whoever u interact with and whenever u do it....

'To Be' or 'Not To Be' Yourself

Every relationship has 2 kinds of people in it. The first kind is the people who pamper…. The other is the ones who get pampered…..
The interesting traits to be noticed in these two types are:

Pampers [referred to as PS hereon] –
Listens to everything the other person has to say
Is more expressive, more romantic, more vocal
Is more understanding and more receptive
Calls very often
Always wants to be a part of the other person’s life – through all the trials and tribulations
On a materialistic front – buys gifts, takes out for dates etc…

Pampered [referred to as PD hereon] –
Throws tantrums all the time
Can get away with hanging up as per mood swings
Low on expression, less vocal
More aggressive, more demanding, more dominating, more space giving
On a materialistic front – Same as pampers (may be at a lesser frequency)

Therefore, as you can see PS essentially acts like the glue keeping the relationship together. They kinda make up for the affections of both the people in the relationship. This is the very core on which the relationship functions and stays stable. Problems creep in when PS starts expecting the similar things from PD. It’s not that PD don’t want to fulfill these expectations. But by the very definition, they are programmed to not function that way. Quite naturally, expectations don’t get fulfilled. PS feels betrayed and why shouldn't they? They are investing their entire energy in this relationship but the returns are few or none. But do we really blame the PD for this? Now if PD changes to match those expectations then isn’t this a negotiation. Isn’t this changing to something you are not?

I always believed that love is accepting a person as it is. But trust me! It’s nothing remotely similar to what I have said in the previous line. In fact it is a battle. A struggle to make ends meet. Mainly starts after that rosy period; when you are faced with the hard reality of time, changing priorities and distance. And it isn’t always the PD who becomes the reason for the outburst. There could be a case when PD may think that PS is just too emotional, too clingy, too not space giving. Just not his/her kinda person. What do you do in this case? Yet another negotiation??????? Or just part ways??????

What makes it even weird and a puzzling mystery is that the same person, who is a PS in some relationships, is the PD in others. Yet after seeing both the sides of the coins, people still have these differences. They have squabbles from minor points to major issues. How do you then still keep the relationship blooming then? How do you know the traits and yet be unreasonable? It’s not that you do not trust, yet you do not understand.

How do you tackle this issue? Where do you find answers for them? Why do movies do not show all these real life love stories? Why do they propagate the myth of girl meets guy, guy fights junta to get the girl and they live happily ever after…In reality.....

Loving is easy, fighting for love and winning it is easier but living with the person you love and still have the same amount of love for that person is what wears you out!!!!!

Inspired by 'Music and Lyrics'

I've been lucky to find my man

Very lucky to get full support, yes! he can

Life is better this way

Smiles around and fears driven away

I wanna be with you forever

I dont wanna leave you, never never....

There is love now in my life

Its smooth sailing, there aint no strife

There is someone walking with me always

There is no parting of our ways

I wanna be with you forever
I dont wanna leave you, never never....

Life never stops, it moves on

We may fight as we move along

But there is one thing I clearly see

You are the best thing that happened to me

I wanna be with you forever
I dont wanna leave you, never never....

There are times when life would be full of confusion
Faced with problems with no solution
But you would always be my strength
To make this work, we would go to any length
I wanna be with you forever
I dont wanna leave you, never never....